Dealing with toxic people is like trying to enjoy a picnic during a thunderstorm—uncomfortable, unavoidable, and downright frustrating. The kicker is that these toxic people are often not just strangers but those close to us—friends, relatives, or even family members. So, how do you protect your peace without losing your cool or your loved ones?
Here’s where a life coach (like me!) might step in with a few strategies to help you navigate this emotional minefield. Let’s break it down.
Step 1: Recognize Toxic Behavior
The first step in solving any problem is recognizing there is one. Because we’re often close to these toxic people, we don’t always realize we’ve been manipulated, gaslighted, or emotionally drained. It’s a bit like being a frog in slowly boiling water—you don’t notice the heat until it’s too late.
Start by paying attention to how you feel after interacting with certain people. Do you feel drained, anxious, or just plain miserable? Do these feelings happen consistently? If so, you might be dealing with toxic behavior. This awareness is crucial—it’s like finally seeing the storm clouds gathering overhead.
Step 2: Set Boundaries—And Stick to Them
Once you’ve identified the toxic behavior, it’s time to start drawing boundaries. This is where things can get tricky, especially if the toxic person is someone you’re close to. But here’s the thing: boundaries aren’t about shutting people out—they’re about protecting your well-being.
Imagine you’re building a little fence around your peace of mind. You don’t want people trampling all over your garden, right? So, if a particular subject or behavior is off-limits, call it out. It might take a bit of courage, but trust me, it will pay off in the long run. And yes, this is where a life coach might come in handy, helping you figure out how to set these boundaries without feeling guilty.
Step 3: Limit Your Exposure
Sometimes, setting boundaries isn’t enough—you need to start limiting your exposure to these toxic people. If it’s a relative you can’t completely avoid, try not to engage them in conversations that trigger toxic interactions. Keep it light, keep it brief, and if possible, keep it to a minimum.
But what if it’s a friend who’s always putting you down or making negative comments? It might be time to consider whether this friendship is really worth your mental health. Start surrounding yourself with more positive, supportive people instead. Remember, your time and energy are precious—spend them wisely.
Letting people go is difficult and I held on to many relationships because of good memories but people grow out of friendships in the same way we do with schools and careers.
Step 4: Build Your Resilience
Dealing with toxic people can feel like being a little boat in a big, stormy ocean. The only way to survive is to build a stronger boat—that is, to build your resilience.
Start taking care of yourself. Engage in activities that strengthen your mind and body, like meditation, exercise, or even just taking a walk in nature. Develop hobbies outside the toxic environment that bring you joy and satisfaction. This is your life—we want you to live it fully, not just survive it.
Also, surrounding yourself with positivity can be a game-changer. Seek out people, experiences, and content that uplift and inspire you. Whether it’s a good book, a new hobby, or even working with a life coach, these positive influences can help you weather the storm.
Step 5: Approach with Empathy—But Not for Their Sake
Lastly, when dealing with toxic people, approach the situation with empathy. Not for them, but for you. This might sound counterintuitive, but here’s the deal: If you can see their toxic behavior as a reflection of their own struggles rather than something personal, you won’t get sucked into their drama.
This doesn’t mean you excuse their behavior, but it does mean you don’t let it drag you down to their level. When you walk away from a toxic interaction with your dignity and sanity intact, you’ll feel so much better.
Why a Life Coach Might Help
You might be thinking, “This all sounds great, but easier said than done.” And you’d be right. That’s where life coaching comes into play. Working with a life coach can provide you with the tools, support, and strategies to effectively handle toxic people in your life. A life coach can help you build those boundaries, strengthen your resilience, and approach these situations with the right mindset.
If you’re struggling with toxic relationships, don’t hesitate to reach out. Life coaching isn’t just about achieving big goals—it’s about navigating life’s everyday challenges, too. And sometimes, having someone in your corner who’s professionally trained to help you through it can make all the difference.
In the end, dealing with toxic people is a journey, not a sprint. It takes time, patience, and a whole lot of self-love. But with the right strategies—and perhaps a little help from a life coach—you can protect your peace, live your life fully, and maybe even enjoy that picnic, rain or shine.